So with 1 more month until I am halfway through pregnancy (ideally anyway), what are your thoughts on finding out the sex of the baby before he/she is born?
Our decision is up in the air with this little sprout. We do have names picked out for both genders, Graham and Lila, so that's not an issue.
Thoughts? Pros/Cons?
15 comments:
It's handy for knowing which clothes to pull out and all of that.
I like finding out because it helps us to feel more attached to the baby. We were able to call him/her by name for so long before the birth that he/she seems like a person long before his/her arrival. And really .. who wants to say "him/her" or "he/she" any longer than necessary?
We have never not found out, though. I think there is definitely an element of surprise we missed out on.
Ben and I both have a "eh .. you decide" sort of personality, so that was what we said all the way until we went in to have the ultrasound. I knew he wanted to find out. He knew I didn't. But we were both willing to do what the other wanted. We still hadn't decided when we went for the u/s. It was sort of like we just waited for the weaker of us to cave.
Good luck deciding.
i agree with the talberts. find out.
i just wanted to say that i like that you put your name choices online for all to see. you have now claimed Lila and Graham so if anyone you know steals them, you have written evidence that they were yours first. i'm a little protective of Elias and Ebin :-) whew, that makes me feel better.
Totally LOVE your names, especially Lila. adorable.
You always struck me as too much like me to be patient enough to wait for the actual birth. ha! i say if you can wait that long, more power to you. I like to know just because I'm insanely impatient!! :o)
Wait it out! It is so worth it, I promise. It is such a neat surprise at the end. You can do it!
I love finding out. It's a super incredible special day right in the middle of pregnancy. I think the birth is special enough on its own. Plus I agree about being connected. I'm always much more attached after I know.
Well...I've done it both ways now. We didn't find out with Ethan and it was so exciting in the OR to hear the "It's a ____!" and be totally surprised. We had agreed not to find out this time, but then I had an extra ultrasound just for fun and caved to curiousity, so now I know, but Dave still doesn't want to know. Since we have both names picked out, it's neat to think of the baby with a name; somehow it makes it feel like a real person down there. So, it's fun both ways...I think you should be surprised this time just to try it. Go to a consignment shop and get a few gender neutral sleepers/gowns in preparation - that will hold you over if it's a girl and you have no pink clothing immediately available.
I am with Katie T. It is just as much of a surprise at 20 weeks as it is at 40. And it helped me bond better also, I thought that was because of my high risk experiance but I guess its true for others as well. I Love your names too. I remember talking to you about baby names before you were married and you said your first kids names were going to be Gray & Laurel :o) Oh how times change :o)
We had compromised and said for the 2nd baby, it would be a surprise. Now that I am pregnant with the first and knowing that it is a girl, I don't know if I could wait. I like calling her by name and having her room and everything ready. On the other hand, what an amazing surprise. Love your names.
I talked to Tom last night about this... again. He told me that I had some good points for finding out, but now, I kind of want to be surprised. I want to know and have everything ready, but be surprised. I want my cake and eat it too, darn it.
Great idea Auntie E!
KH- Being first born is totally a curse. I think it organization and instant gratification comes immediately after birth.
KZ- I had forgotten about that, but you're absolutely right about names! it's funny how God kind of directs you to what you are supposed to name your kid. In the case of Gray... we met Brandon & Heidi and in the case of Laurel... I let my sister use it for my niece (so I get to have the name in my family).
Wait? You were high risk?
Well, you know my goofiness with it this pregnancy but I am excited now. It does add an element of excitement right at delivery. Such suspense!!!!
Ok, I have to give my 2 cents here. For me, it's my first pregnancy. I have nothing to base any of this one, but I'm way too controlling to NOT find out! :) I'm a little psychotic when it comes to mentally preparing for stuff, so I definately will find out. BUT, to each his own. I can definately see how exciting it could be to wait! I'm living vicariously (sp?) through Krissy!
Here is my argument for NOT knowing (2 out of my 3 I didn't know)
1. It keeps excitement in the pregnancy towards the end
2. People have fun guessing
3. Motivation through labor
OR, if you must know...I say, find out with a few weeks remaining rather than a few months...having that info. for SO long takes a bit of the thrill out of it all... OR, have fun knowing...seal it up and disclose the sex at a party/holiday w/friends or family and find out together....
We held out for both of our kids. The surprise at the end was incredible, and I definitely prefer it. Similar to but way better than Christmas as a kid (when presents were more exciting).
That being said, we are planning on finding out the gender of our third (and probably last) upcoming baby. This reason is a) to get to experience it both ways, and b) to let our 2 kids get more attached to and prepared for the new baby before it arrives.
Another problem with finding out though is that I know several people that have been told the wrong gender ahead of time, so they were either completely unprepared and/or a little disappointed.
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